This past week that was offered up a stinking pile of weird wooly Mongolian Worm poo. Or something like that. Maybe not, but there were four-legged whales. Take that, you basic cryptid bitches.
Creepy things people have found while exploring the sea - from a giant eyeball to a lost village (Yeah, lots of weird shit going on in the waters this week. Well, any week, really. From the aforementioned whale to these giant eyeballs and a lost village. Wait...lost village? Altantis, anyone? Probably not, but some of this shit in this article is fah-reeeeky!) Virginia man wins $1M lottery prize seven years after $2.5M jackpot (Ok, this kind of news isn't weird. It just pisses me off. Not that I play the lottery with any regularity anymore. It's as much of a lost cause as the US having decent politicians. I mean, I started a Stash account for fuck's sake...because my only decent shot at retiring out in New Mex or Arizona (or some other weirdshitsville state where I can relax and write and bogey hunt to my heart's content while I can still get around okay depends on my learning to play the stock market and having an extra Roth IRA. Why the hell's he still playing if he won 2.5 mil already?) North Carolina couple win $997,400 with identical lottery tickets (Well, I'm not as legit pissed at this couple. What are the odds, eh? They won almost a mil together. I hope they retire. AND NEVER PLAY THE LOTTERY AGAIN. Save some for the rest of us. I mean, with luck like that...) Nine escaped wolf-dog hybrids captured in North Carolina (Do you want a Beast of Bray Road situation? Because that's how you get a Beast of Bray Road! Not really, but it sounded good, and wolf-dog hybrids are kind of just wrong. Sorry, not sorry. Pitbulls, okay...but this is not okay IMO.) Backseat cows spotted in Wisconsin McDonald's drive-through line (Rumor has it they tried to order a McHuman Sandwich. What the world needs now is man-eating cows. Then Earth and it's modern madness would be complete.) Scientists Discover Fossil Of A 4-Legged Whale With A Raptor-Like Eating Style (That's right. 4-legged whales. With raptor teeth. It only went extinct 43 million years ago. And people claim to still see plesiosaurs in deep lakes all over the world (Nessie, Champ, etc.) Plesiosaurs went extinct 66 million years ago. So, maybe all these lake monsters are raptor whales. Carnivorous raptor whales with LEGS. Hope you're not reading this at bedtime. YIKES.) Persephone, the robot guide, leads visitors in a Greek cave (Yeah...this won't end well. Just sayin'.) Well, that's all the weird shit I have for you this week. 'Til next time...stay strange and unusual.
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